Brady's Page

A Long, Enlightening Weekend…

So...I’ve had plenty of my own worries lately… nothing to bore you with.  I really needed a good weekend at home--and got it.  Spent some quality time with Brady this weekend, really studying what he’s doing and not doing.  Mostly, we just played and smiled. 

We’re trained to look for repetitive behaviors, and I’m noticing a few more with Brady these days.  He intently studies the bricks around our fireplace.  He turns in circles on occasion.  When he’s really happy, he hops and up and down and slaps his hands on his thighs.  He’ll sit and study books by himself.  When his mommy is taking care of his little brother, Brady’s quick to go and wrap himself around his mother’s leg for attention.

Autism still brings out the odd behaviors, but we’re seeing the normal stuff, too. That’s what’s exciting. He wants his mommy!  Just like most kids.  We went to dinner Saturday night with some friends, and for 95% of the meal, Brady was great.  But he got tired and threw an enormous fit--I went running out of the restaurant with him, and he continued to cry outside. We NEVER try this--never try to go out for a meal, but we thought we could do it this time.  It was like a little test, and we almost passed! 

We’re seeing the little victories that autism families hang on to.  We could use more--still waiting for his first word, first throwing of a ball, first “high-five.” It was a good weekend to appreciate what we have in Brady and what he may someday become.

Definitely hang on to those little victories. When most kids do those things, you notice it and acknowledge it, but when a child with autism does those things, it becomes a celebration and you appreciate it so much more. Something as simple as the word “Hi” is never taken for granted. Just last Sunday, my 7-year-old autistic son ran to the front door as his grandparents arrived and said, “Hello Grandpa.” My husband and I looked at each other and said,"Did you see what I just saw?” It puts a warm feeling in your heart and gives you hope each and every time something like that happens. Great job at the restaurant! I’ve spent many meals outside as well! Keep trying, I bet next time you’ll pass! The best advice we’ve ever received is to keep giving our son those kinds of experiences. The more he has, the better it will get. Hang in there and cherish those moments of celebration!

Part of the blessing of being a parent to a child with autism is how we learn to appreciate the small things.  We appreciate each new milestone and celebrate them!  I know that having Brayden in my life has allowed me to see some of the things that I used to take for granted.  As your youngest son grows up, you will find that your appreciation for the small things will carry on with him as well.  Each new word, each time they say “I love you”, each hug - they touch your heart in a whole new way.

I’m happy to hear that your night out went better than you expected.  Our doctor has also encouraged us to take Brayden out to as many places as possible so that he can experience new places, people and situations.  He has extreme social issues - major anxiety - so sometimes these outings are difficult and other times he totally surprises us.  Mforce is right, the more of those kinds of experiences you can give him, the better.  Before long, going out for dinner will just be a normal, everyday occurrence for him and it will help him in adjusting to new places and changes much easier.

Take care, and know that there are so many of us that are right there with you - celebrating the victories and keeping faith that there is so much more to come in the future!